How To Do The Work – Nicole LePera
Genre: Nonfiction – Self-Help, Psychology
Publisher: Orion
Release Date: 11 March 2021
Format read: Audiobook and Paperback (the reviewer alternated between both formats)
Source of book: This book was acquired independently by the Reviewer.
My Thoughts
This How To Do The Work book review comes as the first proper entry into the self-help genre here on Crokes. While my Slow Productivity review was a dip into the water, this time we are fully engaging in what can be truly described as self-help. I am a regular reader of self-help books and content. So my aim with this review (and subsequent ones) is to determine which books are most worth it for your self-improvement journey.
Self-help is a broad field, encompassing works of philosophy, psychology, spirituality, productivity, and work methods. This work is largely of the psychological variety, focusing on those with mental health ailments like depression and anxiety.
In light of my recent Bad Therapy review, it may seem contradictory for me to encourage a book that engages in the trauma-based therapy that books condemn.
But, it’s important for me to clarify: How To Do The Work is for adults. Not because there is graphic content within it, it would sit firmly in a PG rating. But this content is for adults, with already some level of maturity and self-awareness, who are capable of engaging in this content willingly.
I support this use of therapeutic techniques. Rather than wash children in a sea of therapy, it is more appropriate for adults to come to therapy. If they choose to, they can then address their specific concerns.
Content & Information
The author, Nicole LePera, came to prominence as one of the many therapists and mental health advocates on social media. Using platforms like Instagram, LePera engages with her online community about healing from trauma and creating healthy relationships. Her handle online is The Holistic Psychologist.
Instagram therapists as a whole, and LePera in particular, have become controversial with their emerging popularity. As mental health becomes a dominant topic in the culture, some are concerned about the risks of influences giving harmful or damaging advice. This is what Abigail Shrier touched on in Bad Therapy.
LePera emerged into this space and grew a community based on finding alternative methods out of the conventional psychology space. From that social media work, came How To Do The Work.
LePera argues for an individually motivated approach to mental health. She uses her traditional credentials in clinical psychology and her subsequent dissatisfaction and departure from the space. This means encouraging people to engage in exercises like the ones she lays out. Then people can reflect on their past and identify strategies to change their behaviour and attitudes about life.
This book works under the assumption that traumatic past events lead to mental health conditions later in life. It is based on unpicking the habitual behaviours you exhibit based on that.
The concept of trauma-based and somatic-based treatment is based on notable works such as The Body Keeps The Score. If you have read those already, you may find a lot of overlap here. LePera’s discussion and activities in this book are aimed at an audience new to this. Those who need a plain English explanation and simple activities that are not too intimidating.
One thing that does affect my thoughts on this book, is that one of the things LePera is known for is being in a polyamorous relationship. This romantic arrangement, as far as I am aware, started after the release of How To Do The Work. I am quite firmly in the “separate art from artist” camp, and so normally these things would not concern me greatly even if I disagree.
However, it comes into play for me in this book because of the fact that part of the content of this book is about relationship management. LePera draws on her expertise as well as her personal experience. And so in that case, her current relationship status is at least important context for this book.
I can see how her underlying principles are still sound. But as someone who has yet to see a positive, long-term, real-life example of such an arrangement working, it makes me skeptical. Especially since I am not interested in polyamory myself.
Writing
LePera is excellent at making her arguments simple to understand, and at creating activities that are not too difficult for a normal person. Additionally, while critics will say that LePera’s trauma-based explanations for all bad feelings lead to worse outcomes, I’m not sure I agree.
LePera’s message is consistently one of taking back power and self-reliance. The reflections and actions you are supposed to take on are one of considering your actions, and then identifying ways to change your attitudes. In particular, it is always encouraged to not fall into habitual reactions. But, to instead consider how to respond respectfully to others and to yourself.
LePera’s writing is also non-confrontational and open, which I think is needed for a book like this. Readers will likely become emotionally raw at times, so a soft approach is appreciated. As I consumed this book both in print and through audiobook, I found that gentleness was consistent in both versions.
This does not mean that the reader is not held accountable, mind you. But, it feels like an intervention that you are eased into, and are able to then take accountability without a defensive outburst in response.
Overall, it was entertaining to review this coming off of Bad Therapy. Shrier and I would agree How To Do The Work is not appropriate for children. But I believe that this book is effective for adults as a guided work through to help them improve their mindset. Additionally, I found personal benefit myself, as it helped me to reshape my habitual thoughts and actions. For an adult who knows they need to sort themselves out, this is one I would recommend.
TL;DR: A guide to make yourself a responsible and proactive person. Use this to take control of your habitual impulses.
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
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